Personal Life:
It’s approaching two years since losing my sister, Habiba aka Bee. Her death was an earth-shattering experience that shook my entire world. In the first few months after her death, I was very open about my grief, but eventually, I needed to step away from social media to focus on my mental health and support my family, especially Bee’s daughter. Bee, who worked in palliative care, often spoke about death. Most notablible on the tv observational documentary "the hospice" where she was the specialist doctor at Ellenor hospice but no one could have imagined she’d die at just 35.
You can watch the full episodes of The hospice now on youtube together tv. Here is where Bee is introuduced at 5;45 minutes in...
Work Life: Navigating Grief and a Career
At the time of Bee’s death, I was leading a department on a film set for an international shoot, which made returning to work extremely difficult. Grieving in a professional environment can feel isolating, especially in an industry like film and TV, where sometimes there’s immense pressure and you're working as freelancer with no support. People are often uncomfortable discussing death in the workplace, which adds pressure to carry on when sometimes, it’s just not possible.
Getting support
Coping with grief and mental health has meant facing emotional and professional challenges, especially in an industry as demanding as film and television. At first, I tried to compartmentalize my grief and keep working, suffering in silence but it became exhausting and I became unwell. Over time, I’ve realized it’s okay to experience setbacks, and more importantly, it’s okay to seek support when you need it.
I was fortunate to receive help and support from The Film and TV Charity, the Actors BenevolentFund and the NHS when I was in a crisis. For anyone facing a difficult time, organizations like mind and Samaritans are also there to support you. There’s no shame in needing and getting help. Your life, wellbeing and health matters.
Honouring Bee’s Legacy
Part of honoring Bee’s memory is being open about my experience with her death and life that follows. She was tragically killed alongside another kind and caring lady Lisa (mother of four) on her way to work at the William Harvey hospital in Kent. It was an unimagimable shock for all that knew them.
My sister was a healer, and in her spirit still is, I believe it’s important to share this journey, not just for my own healing, but to help break the stigma surrounding death and grief. It’s okay to take a step back, lean on others, and give yourself the grace to heal.
There is so much more I would like share about it all, but for now if this resnotes with you, I would just like you to know you are not alone and you will get through whatever you are facing.
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